From: GXXP
Sent: Friday, February 01, 2002 1:20 PM
To: Showban
Subject: RE: you not on IM yet..

hey babe

you missed a good one. all i can say is the highlights are as follows:

-scott, the friendly neighborhood gay straight bartender who i made out with the last time i saw him, made us delicious drinks, played with our plastic jesus statue, and allowed me, at the end of the night, to recite shakespeare with him (he's auditioning for the tempest). i waltzed behind the bar, grabbed his, er, "package", and made out with him shamelessly. the customers were ignored for quite sometime, until eventually, one of them beseeched my beloved Scott "bartender, praythee may i have a drinketh? i am dying of thirst." scott also happens to have a crush on jen and called me after his shift, but i was passed out on the couch and didn't want to answer my phone.

-jerry, my lovah, hit on my friend heather. i called him a whore. he knows i was only kidding. i also introduced him as "my gay boyfriend" to scott, my "other gay boyfriend." jerry tried to light my hitter box - not the hitter, the actual BOX, at the bar, and doesn't know how he got home.

-reza, our beloved sales engineer, at one point of the evening, quit. he just fucking quit his job. he nearly did the same thing at the christmas party, but didn't leave as he did last night, hugging us and bidding us farewell. he is working from home today and apparently waiting to hear from HR on monday about his "status". he does remember how he got home, and apparently got into a fight with his friend. a knock down drag out fight that has left him bruised and pained, but as he says, they "cool" now.

-stevie also confessed to having a crush on jen and admitting that he wants to have sex with women. he invited me to a superbowl party on sunday given by his friend whose mom is an ambassador in the dominican republic. i am supposed to act as if i don't realize this and drop into conversation that i am going there in april. apparently he is a generous man and will likely invite me to stay in his mom's palatial estate. stevie, like jerry, does not remember how he got home last night. i was the last one to see him, belly up to the bar, talking to a misogynist englishman that verbally attacked me a number of times, at which point he would apologize, but 5 minutes later say something rude about women again.

-heather cried.

-jen had a merry band of onlookers, the most appalling of which was frans, who apparently told her she was hot and grabbed her ass. last night i found this funny and called frans at home to harass him about it. this morning i took it all in and got very upset about the whole thing. i pounded my keyboard in an IM rage, told frans his band sucks and that i support him anyway and don't appreciate him hitting on my friends, who all think he's a big jerk anyway. i marched over to his cube, which is one row behind mine, with my headset still attached to my head. i bungeed back for a second, threw it off my head, and then asked him, in front of the whole office (well, the only people who had made it in by 10 am, that is, which is not many) "who the fuck do you think you are?!" he conceded to talking it out downstairs. he claims to not remember much, and denies malicious intent, and also does not remember how he got home last night.

-jen left with her new russian, to go to scores. jen apparently looked like hot shit last night. good for her.

-jayme was not there but had to get her two cents in and sent this missive to frans:

Franz,
In light of recent events, I feel as if I can at long last confess my true feelings to you. It has come to my attention that you have no ethical qualms whatsoever, with propositioning your recent ex's nearest and dearest friends. Everyday I pray to sweet Jesus in heaven that one day you will grab my ass in public.
Jayme

i live a fucking funny life. i have rockstar stories too. the email flirtation is reaching climactic proprotions. we must see one another soon. jen and i have concert tix tonight, would you like to meet us after?