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Recent Bitching
 
What's the deal with hipsters?
By Jen

For quite some time now, I've been incredibly intrigued and annoyed by a certain group of people who reside in our fair city. Up until recently, I wasn't aware that this group had an "official" title. Fortunately, a recent blog by Glenda not only firmed up a label for said group, but made me realize that I'm not the only one intersted in this fascinating new breed of young adults. These people are Hipsters. The New York City Anti-Hipster Forum really gives a clear cut definition of what a Hipster IS. Just so we're all on the same page, here is a list (courtesy of the forum) of traits typical of most Hipsters:

10. Hails from the Midwest, lives somewhere in Brooklyn.

9. Owns at least two Guided By Voices albums.

8. Firmly believes that Ralph Nader should have won the 2000 presidential election.

7. General arts over-education (i.e. has either designs to attend graduate school, is in graduate school or has gone to graduate school)

6. Parents shoulder some of his/her financial burden.

5. Owns at least three too tight T-shirts adorned with dated symbols (usually fuzzy or shiny/decal) with which he/she has absolutely no knowledge or connection.

4. Can readily and willfully recall the theme song from at least one television sitcom that was cancelled before his/her birth.

3. Will consciously muss and/or neglect to wash hair in order to achieve a 'look.' (male only)

2. Is of the opinion that 'Pet Sounds' is the greatest Beach Boys album (a comment generally follow by this statement): 'rivaling the Beatles' Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band.'

1. Insists on calling movies 'film,' insists on calling concerts 'shows.'

Understand now? I know you must have gotten a glimpse of these people walking around amongst us commoners...either that or perhaps you ARE a Hipster, and in that case, I'd l be eternally grateful if you could offer up your expertise on the topic of Hipsterdom. I have quite a few questions about you and your, uh.... kind:

1. How do you become a Hipster? Does it take time or do you just slap on some pointy shoes and a silly-logoed shirt and you're in? Do you have to prove your knowledge of Hipster music and fashion before being accepted into the community? Is there a period of time where you are a "Hipster-in-training" (H.I.T.) Is there an initiation ceremony? A secret handshake? How does the transformation take place??!!!??!!

2. Do you ever run accross a wannabe Hipster? Someone who is always on the outskirts looking in. Someone who just hangs onto the coattails of the local neighborhood Hipsters. What makes this person not able to fit in with your people?? Do you concoct elaborate schemes so you can avoid having to hang out with this person? Do you you send him on Hipster errands, making him pick up hair pommade and stylish belts, but never really let him into your clan?

3. Do Hipster characteristics vary from neighborhood to neighborhood? For instance, in Fort Greene the other day I ran accross a group of Hipsters dining in an Indian restaurant. These Hipsters possessed traits that I had not seen before in my previous run-ins with Hipsters. For instance:

**They all positively reeked of Gucci rush. Is Gucci a Hipster favorite???
**Several of the Hipsters were in posession of those silly little scooters. The Razor ones. They had parked them in the restaurant, and they were blocking the way for other patrons.
**They all ordered their meals in the manner of a persnickety old man. (i.e...dressing on the side, no oil, tea without caffeine, omitting specific ingredients, etc. etc.)
** Two of the six Hipsters wore their headphones the entire time they were sitting with their friends. They would occasionaly take them off to interject something into the conversation, leading me to question whether or not they were actually listening to anything on the headphones, and were instead simply wearing them to look edgy and hip.
**Several of them had horrendous manners.

Please tell me, is this typical of all Hipsters or just Fort Greene Hipsters?

4. Do hipsters act hipster-ish all the time? Do they sleep in Hipster pajamas? Are they pouty and blase even in their sleep? Do they wake up in the morning spouting obscure musical references even before their morning coffee? Do they drink morning coffee, or is coffee not hip enough?

As you can see I have a lot of questions. Any information that anyone can give me will be most helpful.


September 30, 2002 · 04:38 PM
Permanent Link · Comments (95)
Comments

haha, i can't help you much with you questions about hipster, as i am about as befuddled about them as you are, but that H.I.T. thing was quite funny. Maybe they have hipster internships where you can get some kind of 'cred,' kinda like school credit, but it only means something to their kind.

Posted by: bryan on October 1, 2002 09:01 AM

Having lived in New York City for a number of years, I have witnessed the hipster phenomenon for quite some time. Recently, however, it's clearly getting out of control. The situation grew particularly dire this winter when I was interrogated at Welcome to the Johnson’s by a pack of hipsters who looked disdainfully upon my outfit and tested my knowledge of Williamsburg. My familiarity with Pete’s Candy Store earned me some short-lived credibility, but they soon tired of our conversation and sauntered their ski-cap wearing asses (indoors, of course) over to another unsuspecting patron at the bar. I haven’t felt that insecure since about sixth grade. F*#!ing hipsters, they should be purged from the planet so the joy can return to New York nightlife again.

Posted by: GxxP on October 1, 2002 10:13 AM

I love henry rollins' qoute on one of his spoken word albums about not getting into petty hate. At least not hating specific people but groups, better yet humanity. I can't stand hipsters, or hip-hopsters (same thing as hipsters but they are more about some obscure ass hip-hop crap that sucks and only them and their friends like). Well somebody sent this link to me and it may help.....http://www.soyouwanna.com/site/syws/indierock/indierock.html

Posted by: bill on October 15, 2002 01:20 AM

Globalisation of Hipsters: Hipsters in UK.

Hey! seems like theres a quite a lot in common between US + UK hipsters- we have them too!
What pisses me off is they think they're really individual yet all manage to look the same. Pointy shoes, worn out denim with neat holes (from Diesel obviously), fashionistas with asymettric hair, bad eighties clothes (retro is about taste too darling).

Oh yeah, and they reckon they (currently) wank on about electroclash, yet can only name Fischerspooner.
See i help run a night in sheffield and manchester, and you get these people who come and they think they're really in to their cos they like the Strokes, yet play any Stooges or Velvet underground and they don't have a clue!

it's like they try to buy a life style "off the peg" and they get told what to like by what ever magazine is in at the time.

E.G. Dazed and Confused is the current life style for the hipsters in the UK. they're coming to my night in a couple of days cos they know this guy in one of the bands that are playing. I think they're expecting a load of hipsters (also called Vernons cos of TV presenter Vernon Kay, do a search to see what I mean) yet our night attracts the unconventionally cool, the sort of people who don't give a fuck and dress how they like cos they're in to a certain scene or something (rather than observing a certain scene then thinking they can be part of it by dressing in a certain way).y'know like people who are in to trashy glamour, eyeliner boys, not 'dullard @ GAP'

must....end.....rant....!!!

Posted by: "death goes to the disco" on November 5, 2002 11:46 AM

1. How do you become a Hipster? Does it take time or do you just slap on some pointy shoes and a silly-logoed shirt and you're in? Do you have to prove your knowledge of Hipster music and fashion before being accepted into the community?

A. You must move and/or drop all your non hipster friends, and esentially eliminate any evidence that you did not come out of the womb with extensive knowelege of leftist politics and obscure record labels. Kill your parents if need be.
2. Do you ever run accross a wannabe Hipster?

A. A wannabe is easy to spot. When confronted with a wannabe, you must mock them and their tastes mercilessly until they cry.

3. Do Hipster characteristics vary from neighborhood to neighborhood?

A.There are several types of hipster, trends or often determined by what art for they choose as a 'career.' For example, writers tend to look more tweedy. What sort of independent music they listen to also makes a differnce. Trends vary with punks, indie pop/rockers, those into electroclash, ect.

**They all positively reeked of Gucci rush. Is Gucci a Hipster favorite???

A.Real hipsters should not wear designer fragrances or clothes in general unless it looks like it's from the Salvation Army or Marc Jacobs gives them free stuff (see the members of Sonic Youth).

**Several of the Hipsters were in posession of those silly little scooters. The Razor ones. They had parked them in the restaurant, and they were blocking the way for other patrons.

A. Hipsters care only for themselves and their mobility.

**They all ordered their meals in the manner of a persnickety old man.

A.The majority of hipters are vegan, i.e. no meat or animal products and many have imagined food allergies.

** Two of the six Hipsters wore their headphones the entire time they were sitting with their friends.

A. Hipters are often former nerds who revel in finally being cool, however, they have panic attacks due to years of abuse at the hands of classmates the music soothes anxiety.

**Several of them had horrendous manners.

A. This is an effort to cover up good breeding.

4. Do hipsters act hipster-ish all the time? Do they sleep in Hipster pajamas?

A. Yes.

Are they pouty and blase even in their sleep?

Yes.

Do they wake up in the morning spouting obscure musical references even before their morning coffee?

A. Hipsters often debate with their hipster partners in the morning on topics such as the merits of GBV versus Built To Spill. I know I do.

Do they drink morning coffee, or is coffee not hip enough?
They drink coffee or green or herbal tee.

Posted by: on January 27, 2003 04:53 PM

Do hipsters act hipster-ish all the time?
*no, not always.

Do they sleep in Hipster pajamas?
*yes. maybe sometimes naked.

Are they pouty and blase even in their sleep?
*especially after nightmares of horrendoes anorexic socialites wearing phur coats batting them down with Burkin Bags on the L train

Do they wake up in the morning spouting obscure musical references even before their morning coffee?
*most likely.

Do they drink morning coffee, or is coffee not hip enough?
*hey, is that a bob dylan reference?? ha ha ha
(laughs smuggly as she realizes this is a foolish ploy of propadanda)
let's a drive suvs and decorate our homes a la martha stewart? maybe not. i can't belive this...

Posted by: nell on March 15, 2003 10:02 PM

must of the comments have been true here but the only way to become a hipster is to be defined as one by your peers. display impressive knowledge of music, show the right amount of condescension, get called deck as ef by a few people and you're basically in. and you can't really become one, you kind of have to be one from the start or be seen as a poser. oh there is actually a way to stay polishin. there's a rule book for hipsters far and wide. it's called "the hipster handbook" and it's by ray lanham. it comes complete with a dictionary, hipster fashions, and actually breaks down the many hipsters into their own little classifications.

Posted by: sarah on May 7, 2003 10:01 PM

Man I feel like I'm in some terrible movie where everyone has just graduate all too late but they all have plans to be super stars. But really they all need to just wake up and shut the hell up about traveling to Thailand and or becoming Governor. Philly has got a bad case of the hipster and I'm afraid to say that sometimes I too dress like a dumb reject for the show Webster or Silver Spoons. Becuase these is all the hipsters understand. T.V.! Now in my poor corpor life I earn a meager living becuase I don't live off my parents trustfund accounts or had I rum away from my over conroling mother. I've just moved in with her. In hopes to someday slit my own wrist from the blank reality of it all. I just want to say this about hipsters. I'm sorry you were so lame as children and that your parents soiled you rotten, but you should really really please remember your manners. Because one day you will come upon some that isn't as patience as the rest and they will have to beat you up. I swear.

Posted by: Cushwake on October 7, 2003 02:33 PM

1. How do you become a Hipster? When you can be found at any dive bar in Silverlake, echo park, Los feliz, or Star Shoes in Hollywood. Also, if you attend your friends art shows in "LA". Looks count big time in this little scene. Ahh of course you can't afford the $100 jeans...so steal them.) Does it take time or do you just slap on some pointy shoes and a silly-logoed shirt and you're in?...( Correct. It's pretty much like that these days. Unless you look like Rossie O'Donald then uhh, your obviously not a hipster. No matter how hard you try, Seven Jeans and pointy shoes look bad on fat people.) Do you have to prove your knowledge of Hipster music and fashion before being accepted into the community?( No not at all! Hipsters don't know Hendrix from Hives...all you need is Diesel jeans and or Seven Jeans, some vintage top/purse/jewelry/side bag/jacket/scarf/big sunglasses and Chinese slippers from Urban outfitters, pointy heels, a hair school haircut, and being on coke is a must. Is there a period of time where you are a "Hipster-in-training" (H.I.T.) Is there an initiation ceremony? A secret handshake? How does the transformation take place??!!!??!! (Now that's just an absurd question. How does anyone become who they are? What causes people who are into hip hop and rap dress a certain way? Or any musical genre for that matter? Same with sports, same with class, same with any other excuse for a certain fashion look. It's just another person out there wanting to sub divide every little detail in life...classifying and labeling things. Thus little comments like Punk rocker, hipster, jock, bro, hippie, goth etc etc. They are just people...In my opinion diversity is better then being the common drown.

2. Do you ever run across a wannabe Hipster? (There is never a way to tell.)Someone who is always on the outskirts looking in. Someone who just hangs onto the coattails of the local neighborhood Hipsters. What makes this person not able to fit in with your people??( If you sell coke you can pretty much be any type of hipster you wish to be.) Do you concoct elaborate schemes so you can avoid having to hang out with this person? ( Uhh. What? maybe if your in the seventh grade) Do you you send him on Hipster errands, making him pick up hair pommade and stylish belts, but never really let him into your clan? ( Uhh sure...Who came up with this?)

3. Do Hipster characteristics vary from neighborhood to neighborhood? ( Yes. I'm sure the hipsters residing in Compton are a tad different from the ones calling Huntington Beach home.) For instance, in Fort Greene the other day I ran across a group of Hipsters dining in an Indian restaurant. These Hipsters possessed traits that I had not seen before in my previous run-ins with Hipsters. For instance:

**They all positively reeked of Gucci rush. Is Gucci a Hipster favorite??? ( No. Only if you find yourself saying things like "That was a grand night at the Opera. How about you, me, a bottle of Champaign with strawberries and my condo." The "Natural" cologne of a hipster is in.)
**Several of the Hipsters were in possession of those silly little scooters. The Razor ones. They had parked them in the restaurant, and they were blocking the way for other patrons. ( Walk, run, fly, drive, hop, rock, scoot, as long as you look cool doing it your in.)
**They all ordered their meals in the manner of a persnickety old man. (i.e...dressing on the side, no oil, tea without caffeine, omitting specific ingredients, etc. etc.) ( yeah, they tend to do that. Some have vegan or vegetarian morals to abide by)
** Two of the six Hipsters wore their headphones the entire time they were sitting with their friends. They would occasionally take them off to interject something into the conversation, leading me to question whether or not they were actually listening to anything on the headphones, and were instead simply wearing them to look edgy and hip. ( Whoever wrote this is way to damn perceptive..did you follow someone in the bathroom to see if they wiped their ass with the provided toilet paper or if they brought their own? People are people no matter what they are into...who cares if those particular ones were listening to music while dining. That's weird but maybe that's what they were into.)
**Several of them had horrendous manners. ( Again, it's not a "hipster" trait to consume food with bad manors. Anyone can do that..hipster or not)

Please tell me, is this typical of all Hipsters or just Fort Greene Hipsters? ( It may be typical of just PEOPLE. )

4. Do hipsters act hipster-ish all the time? ( Does someone change every time the hour changes? uhh I think they act the same all the time just like you do.) Do they sleep in Hipster pajamas? ( Do you sleep in hipster PJ's? ) Are they pouty and blase even in their sleep? ( They don't sleep...They just party.) Do they wake up in the morning spouting obscure musical references even before their morning coffee?( I hope not...they are supposed to be talking about Seven jeans and coke.) Do they drink morning coffee, or is coffee not hip enough? ( Coffee is most definitely Hip.)

Of course my tone upon replying to this was written in utter comedic sarcasm. Although, some answers stated above may be true. All in all it's not to be taken seriously. I just came upon this site and found myself with nothing to do other then voice my ranting. When I first read the questions asked I was wondering if the tone of them were in seriousness. Then I realized they were...I don't understand how people are still so un accepting of anything that is not found on the TV, Radio, or any other media beguiling broadcast. Aside from the Hipster "Look" which is in the media now. I definitely joke at the thought of a hipster because of things such as this. Me being in the music scene and finding myself abruptly labeled as a hipster just because I look a certain way. Fake hipster, real hipster, hip-hopster, common bar goer, hippie, bro, guieto, or what have you. All people are creeps. It's not hip otherwise. It's just with lists like these you have us sounding like some found foreign object from space.

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Posted by: bling bling on February 2, 2004 10:07 PM

I'm not exactly sure what my opinion on the subject is but this made me laugh my ass of and whether you love or hate hipsters, this should make you laught too

http://www.nationallampoon.com/nl/03_voices/hipster/hipster.asp

Posted by: Michael Redmond on March 25, 2004 03:30 PM

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Posted by: orin graham on April 10, 2004 09:25 PM

I just moved to Ft. Greene and have yet to see any hipsters. I have dabbled in that scene and my hair is often mussed, but I am not a fiscal burden on the parents. But Pet Sounds is great! Let's be honest about that.

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